Relationships are difficult in Africa!

As a pastor, I have to deal with a lot of relationship related problems. Take this past weekend as one example. We had a church camp, where a lot of us went camping with our caravans, some with tents, some staying in the chalets of the holiday resort.

But even here it pops out. Relationships between male and female just can be so tough!

For example: He really works hard to provide a home for her. I know, I know, my feminist friends will be up in arms again, maybe that is a sexistic oldfashioned way of looking at life. But this is Africa, and this is how it still works in some cultures. The responsibility to provide a home rests on his shoulders. He has to really dig deep, and work extremely hard, to get everything ready, before she will even look at him. He tries his utmost best to please her.  It is just work, work, work. He does not even get a single kiss for all his trouble.

And then, when he thinks he has saved enough, and worked hard enough to provide a roof over her head, he finally gathers all his courage and proposes to her- let’s cohabitate! Let us live together, make love, and raise our kids…

But even after all his efforts, sometimes she will just turn him down. She just is not interested in him, Or do he really expects her to live in THAT neighbourhood?  Could there not even be a more scenic view? MAybe her mother and her sister warned her about him and his family.

So this weekend, on our church camp- it exploded between them. It is so hard to see the implosion of a relationship. It is never a good sight to see a home, that was built with such great love and dedication, getting so broken so easily… This all happened on the church camp, of all places…

But wait- I have taken some photos in case you don’t believe me:



When planning a relationship, do your homework to see what is expected from you…

The most important three things to remember in real estate: location, location, location!

The most important three things to remember in real estate: location, location, location!


Plan your work, then work your plan…


Nearly there! Time to start planning the proposal!


Time to go ask for her… paw? Hope I look good enough, and the house I built will make her happy… maybe I will see my unborn children in her eyes tonight…


Love hurts!

So sorry, relationships don’t always work out in Africa! Broken homes are a sad reality in our society as well. And we even see the devastating effects of social disintegration on our church camp!

Back to the dating game, meeting new friends at the restaurant...

Back to the dating game, meeting new friends at the restaurant…

And so- Mr Finch is trying to get back on his feet…

24 thoughts on “Relationships are difficult in Africa!

  1. you had me convinced it was a couple badly in need of a shepherd – those male weavers are so resilient and industrious. Suitors should take some inspiration from them

  2. Thoroughly enjoyed reading this, though I can’t help but feel sorry for Mr. Finch…you’re too good for her, my friend! Great pics as well…amazing wildlife in your part of the world.

  3. They’re very funny birds, I always feel sorry for Mr Finch who spends ages making a home, only to have the love of his life, the future mother of his children tear it apart… and after all that, he keep building them until they’re perfect. If only people didn’t give up so easily. Lovely post 🙂

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